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Great Minds have similar thoughts
"i cant really tell, im too poor on fantasy and intelligence to know or feel or see..." -Realism Is A Drag
"poets are dreamers... we daydream at our own peril" -Dr.Garnett
"those who write clearly have readers, those who write obscurely have commentators." -Albert Camus
"There are no facts, only interpretations." -Friedrich Nietzsche
"No man would set a word down on paper if he had the courage to live out what he believed in. Tropic of Cancer." -Henry Miller
"A man who lives for music dies into the same silence as one who lives for the pen or sword." -Floyd Skloot
"A painter paints pictures on canvas. But musicians paint their pictures on silence." -Leopole Stokowski
"Only boring people are bored for long, and bored people are always boring." -Irvine Welsh
"Art is a lie which tells the truth." -Pablo Picasso
"just when you think tomorrow will never come; it's yesterday." -Earl Wilson
"We imagine always when we speak that it is our own ears, our own mind, that are listening." -Marcel Proust
"We act as though comfort and luxury were the chief requirements of life, when all that we need to make us happy is something to be enthusiastic about." -Albert Einstein
"There is only one thing that I know for certain: the value judgements of human beings are undoubtedly guided by their desire for happiness and thus amount to an attempt to back up their illusions with arguments." -Sigmund Freud
"People would rather make the void their purpose than be void of purpose." -Friedrich Nietzsche
"We are all in the gutter, but some of us are looking at the stars."." -Oscar Wilde
"this is the worst world of all the worlds was it just a bit more worse it could not even exist!" -Arthur Schopenhauer
"When it is dark, the objects and I will come out of limbo. Nausea" -Jean-Paul Sartre
"We all need mirrors to remind ourselves of who we are – I’m no different." -Leonard Shelby
"If God created us in His image we have certainly returned the compliment." - Voltaire
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    Thursday, January 27, 2005

    BLAH BLAH HTML...

    hey. its not even a friday. nobody's home (well, this I actually like). and nobody's online! whattha! yea, I know I said I won't be posting for a while. erase that. it's just one of my panic-attacks. now im clicking thru and reading random blogs. and yep, wasting pre-paid internet time. (ya all know how sloooow my crappy connection is tho) and erm, im pathetically refreshing my inbox over and over. waiting for emails esp from my ambres! (yes, and im declaring his name out loud... Ambres!) hey, his blog isn't up at the mo. sniff*

    and nothing's goin on at slsk, not even my wishlist. arg! all my dloads are in queue like 50-ish or more than a 100th. and the home.nl page shared to me have the 6th song onwards undownloadable. brr...

    there is a constantly appearing pop up that says I should upgrade my Windows Internet Explorer. hmm.. I dunno if I should trust this one. so im repeatedly clicking "no".

    so now, I only have the chioce to update my blog, or edit html, blah blah. then I searched for free music links and found
    this site.

    woah! cool skin and intro (with music, of course) but currently no shared html music links. blah! althought a good choice of name for a site... kinda reminds me of the Ocean Blue's Cerulean album. ha! you can choose from their background templates tho. and yes, it's free. but don't link to their page as it crowds their bandwidth(webmaster emphasizes this) blah.

    ok, fine. search some more... ooh. ooh. tutorials! mmm... trying the codes to
    color my scrollbar. mmm.. from aol. well, it does show when I preview it. prob is when I saved my template, and "view blog" it doesn't show. blah! and it took me a while to edit the colors.. brr..

    here's a cute html.
    circular mouse curser now this I've gotta try.

    ooh, wait. I've got mail!

    hah, from my aunt in LA. sent me their family pictures from last christmas and new year. hmm... miss my cousins! now i've gotta reply on this. they wanted me to study up Nursing. well, dunno if I can do that. nothing to lose, they said. hmm.. i say maybe internet time. hah! im such a bum.

    clicking some more...

    more tutorials...

    doesn't work.

    search again...

    blah! java. can't understand this.

    brrr...
    searching. waiting. weee! my ambres is online. oh, well... see y'all.


    -----
    note: now posting while jumping like a child with a skip rope...

    Monday, January 24, 2005

    A Dream Within A Dream

    By: Edgar Allan Poe


    Take this kiss upon the brow!
    And, in parting from you now,
    Thus much let me avow-
    You are not wrong, who deem
    That my days have been a dream;
    Yet if hope has flown away
    In a night, or in a day,
    In a vision, or in none,
    Is it therefore the less gone?
    All that we see or seem
    Is but a dream within a dream.

    I stand amid the roar
    Of a surf-tormented shore,
    And I hold within my hand
    Grains of the golden sand-
    How few! yet how they creep
    Through my fingers to the deep,
    While I weep- while I weep!
    O God! can I not grasp
    Them with a tighter clasp?
    O God! can I not save
    One from the pitiless wave?
    Is all that we see or seem
    But a dream within a dream?


    -----
    note: no added notes here... just me having the same thoughts..

    Sunday, January 23, 2005

    probably won’t ever

    I am in a bubble
    hovering among endless space
    My mind boils
    and evaporates with the fume
    of treadlesness
    I’ve never known
    the meaning of it all
    probably, won’t ever

    For the fragments of a forgotten past
    eats out my energy and breath
    Hate me for no reason
    Or no reason
    you leave me

    I’m a useless beat
    for a rhythm of undying agony
    My thoughts least pardon
    laid down to a rest
    And my breath shall triumph once more
    among beasts gone decay

    Nothing is my virtue
    And my life washes down the drain
    For no one can see the inner me
    And probably, won’t ever.

    Saturday, January 22, 2005

    proposal left on a dangle

    Please bear with me. Guess, I had too much vodka…. Or wish I had.
    Too much things running inside my head. I do not want to think at the moment, nor do I want to stop to think about you. But…

    Are you for real? Am I for real? Is that love that you feel? I mean, is it Really Love? This is a risk. And should I take this risk? Are you ready to take this risk with me? This is a gamble of fate. Of happiness. What are your intentions? What are My intentions? Do you really mean what you say? I will not ask if I do, coz I do, and that is the lone fact that binds everything else. You know, lust is not the driving point for me. But how clear are you on me regarding this matter? I have always been fantasizing of going to Athens with you… (hence, the already existing files about passports and visas) But I am not a heroine from a novel. I am not a nymph ready to grant any wishes. For my own desires are locked inside myself.

    The step we are going to take, if ever materialized, is dangerous, profound, and yet solemn in every little aspect that may seem. But the sincerity is vague. Round-trip ticket? Staying for how long? Staying for what reason? We should be clear about our decisions. This may be a leap of faith. Or a leap to tragedie. I don’t wanna burry myself with endless sorrow… I don’t wanna feel worn out again… nor do I wanna burry myself with thoughts of endless “what if’s”. What pain shall I tolerate? The pain of being away from everything I know, and grew up knowing? Or the possible pain of being alone in a place I never knew?

    And now, nothing from you for the past week is all the more confusing me. And then again... can I handle you? Can you handle me? You know my numbers. You know my mails. But nothing. And yes... NOTHING. Not a word. Not a ring. Not a smoke signal.

    And now I fear... does nothing mean nothing? Do I have meaning to you at all?

    -----

    note: a forgotten letter written a long time ago for someone whose name I already forgot... or wish to forget.

    Sunday, January 16, 2005


    ik wil wegdromen in jou armen Posted by Hello

    Sunday, January 09, 2005

    ALONE

    by: Edgar Allan Poe

    From childhood's hour I have not been
    As others were; I have not seen
    As others saw; I could not bring
    My passions from a common spring.
    From the same source I have not taken
    My sorrow; I could not awaken
    My heart to joy at the same tone;
    And all I loved, I loved alone.
    Then- in my childhood, in the dawn
    Of a most stormy life- was drawn
    From every depth of good and ill
    The mystery which binds me still:
    From the torrent, or the fountain,
    From the red cliff of the mountain,
    From the sun that round me rolled
    In its autumn tint of gold,
    From the lightning in the sky
    As it passed me flying by,
    From the thunder and the storm,
    And the cloud that took the form
    (When the rest of Heaven was blue)
    Of a demon in my view.

    ----
    Yes, poem by Edgar Allan Poe. Need I say more?

    Saturday, January 08, 2005

    Soaring with Syd Barrett . . .

    A ring.
    shivering
    non-silence.
    Waterfalls
    drowning
    floating
    stones
    fishes
    bubbles
    air
    breeze
    mist
    clouds
    raindrops
    storm
    tornadoes
    flying
    screaming
    beauty
    rainbows
    fireflies
    leaves
    fields
    wind
    circling
    hair
    falling
    soft sheets
    crawling
    lying
    coughing
    smoke
    fog
    taste.
    Linger.
    Disconnect.
    ----
    note: Or should I say ...Nico meets Velvet in the Underground of Heaven (?)
    nhe, that's a different story...

    Friday, January 07, 2005

    -=-SULLEN-=-

    Today I celebrate
    The death of my vanity
    And all my pretensions
    Concealed within its grave

    Lost
    Wanting
    And nowhere to be found
    My nonexistent being
    Melts away…

    I yearn with dismay
    For my inauspicious state
    Tuant, empty,
    Weak.

    I have nothing
    Much less to offer
    To myself
    But my perplexed undetermined
    Peevishness.

    Down by the tantamount
    Countless tears
    Shed through the skin
    I weep
    A loud mockery
    Of my own self.

    And the world shifted
    With what’s left of me
    A feverent continuality.

    Whatever it takes
    Whatever I do
    Into the light outside
    The other half of me
    Will continue to speak
    In a circulation within
    Needless of scrutiny
    Imbedded.
    Hidden.
    To the depths of my soul.

    Thursday, January 06, 2005

    . . . . . .Sonneta. . . . . .

    There I was in a world
    Unknown. Untouched.
    Behind all the agony
    Behind all the fallacies
    The remnant of a shattered memory
    Drawing near
    Falling far apart
    And all that’s left
    All that’s gone
    Is me.

    Saturday, January 01, 2005

    STALK

    I dream for you
    To be for you
    But all the time your window is closed
    I see you through the glass
    A reflection of myself maybe falls
    Between us when the sun comes out ...

    ... so give me life and soul to go
    When the sun shines bright
    And give me love and lust and hope
    In the darkest night ...

    Your blinds are blind
    And your cats want the birds
    In my garden heaven
    Where I'm lodging tonight
    And the glass in your window
    Is killing tomorrow for me ...

    Closer and closer ...
    we can't get much older
    I'm smashing but breaking
    My heart has awoken
    These windows will soon shatter for me
    It's black on the outside
    It's black on the inside
    Together we'll make it
    Darkness sedated to grey ...

    But the bars at your window
    Are killing tomorrow for me ...

    ... so give me life and soul to go
    When the sun shines bright
    And give me love and lust and hope
    In the darkest night ...



    -----
    note: Track 5 of Population Four - by the Cranes

    i can't really get enough of this song. i can play it on repeat mode for more than 30 minutes, or more than an hour, and i still am dazed. just staring at nothing. thinking about everything.







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