twisted thoughts within my four brick walls...

moody monday: colorful

2009-05-12T19:03:00.002+09:00

who would blame me for loving the color blue?

took this photo last month in one of the hidden gems of subic. club morocco.
tho this gem needs a little polishing and the management is clearly doing something about it.

if you've been there, you wouldnt mind seeing those ships and cargos parked by the distance as long as you stay in the pool.

alas! it would have been lovelier if i spent the sunset strolling by the beach with you*.*

---
note: long awaited entry for moody monday

the long wait..

2009-04-19T00:10:00.003+09:00

“Waiting is painful. Forgetting is painful. But not knowing which to do is the worse kind of suffering.” - Paulo Coelho

to those who kept on returning and checking on this blog, thank you.

i have been in hiatus for months
but it doesn't mean i have forgotten this place.
it doesn't mean that i will stop painting,
drawing, taking photos and writing poems.
some of these were indeed placed on hold for a while,
while i wait for time to stop.

sometimes i wish to hold time and wish a day
to never end. sometimes i wish time could move
fast forward to that day,
that day
which i wish to not end.
but these only happens in dreams
and some dreams seemed reality.
while reality sometimes seems
to be dreams.

since the time i have gone, i've been to places
where i wish to never leave. and soon as i got back
i look back
and my memories feel like everything was just a dream.
my only proof for myself
are the photos i have taken,
and the memories that kept on running over and over
in my head.

i do not feel confused, but it whirls me in the cycles
in my mind. please don't confuse this as something sad,
for it was lovely. all lovely.
the time spent on those places were memories that i wish
to not forget. but i guess they were all
too lovely to last.

and the only sad thing is..
the wait.
and
waiting
for it all to happen again.

and while you wait,
while we wait,
this blog is under construction. my apologies..

---
- "Heaven or Bliss" *image above is my entry for photofriday's topic: circular

..hiatus..

2008-10-23T19:37:00.002+09:00

my past 2 weeks were extremely busy and the next week ahead is most likely as equal or even greater. im not sure when i will have free time so this is a post to let you know (and i thought i'll never say this..) i'll be on hiatus for a while.. i'll try my best to reply and visit your blogs but i apologize in advance if i wont be able to after this day.. i shall miss illo friday and all my online friends. you will be on my thoughts everyday..

now i leave you all with an old poem i wrote and a photo i took while traveling to southern manila..

Don't Close Your Eyes

as i hear the -
leaves crash to the wind
walls of echoes
paint my deserted room
the linen adrift
flying floating
as cold whispers
wrap my whole being

as i close my -
eyes in deep longing
i float more lighter
almost liquefying
swimming to that shadow
to drink the poison
of its undying spell
drowning my head in compassion

as i feel the -
whole world spinning
catch the waves tightly holding
take me to the other side
carry me.. carry me..
and let me continuously fly
as the breeze swallow me
in one big.. deep.. sigh

© 02.10.06

String: Blog Action Day 2008

2008-10-15T01:00:00.007+09:00

Today marks the day of a special event in the history of the blogworld. The purpose of Blog Action Day is to create a discussion. Bloggers are asked to take a single day out of their schedule and focus it on an important issue. Last year's topic was The Environment. This year we focus on the mammoth issue of global Poverty.

Growing up, we were taught that we live in a third world country. And there are limits to what we can do and what we can get. I've always been a big dreamer when I was young and I always wanted to prove the grown ups wrong that we can only do as much. I also used to be a strong believer with the statement Kung hindi ka kikilos ngayon, kelan pa? ("If you won't act now, then when?")

Here are the facts:

The map of the world with classifications:

First (blue), Second (red), and the Third World (green) countries during the Cold War era. Does not necessarily represent a current world view.

But according to the list of third world countries, the Philippines is not included in terms of Political Rights and Civil Liberties, Gross National Income (GNI), Human Development, Poverty and Press Freedom.

There are 50 countries listed in the United Nations comparative analysis of poverty, 34 African countries, 10 Asian countries, 5 Pacific Island Nations and one Caribbean nation.

The 10 Asian third world countries are: Afghanistan, Bangladesh, Bhutan, Cambodia, Laos, Maldives, Myanmar, Nepal, Timor-Leste and Yemen.

And just recently have I encountered the term fourth world, and these are nations without states. But that's another story.

I guess, now that I have passed the age of idealism, agitated adolescence with radical actions, adding that i went through a personal dark age of my life.. time killed the passion. I remain in support and still believe the causes of course, but not as active as before.

Now joining the blog action day reminds me that time is really an issue with the long battle against poverty and change. One random act of kindness per person, when accumulated, creates change.

So I leave a question for everyone, if we won't act now, when will you? When?

update: now i leave you with an old collage i made back in 2005.. "hidden places"
click the image to read the poem i wrote esp for this piece

illo friday: strings

2008-10-10T19:48:00.004+09:00

and im floating with strings of thoughts and dreams..

back in 2004.. when i first started blogging.. here's one of the thoughts i randomly scribbled down.. half awake half intoxicated.. consumed in escaping and dreaming..

"I have a bad hobby. And its driving me nuts. When I do it, I think about impossible possibilities miles away beyond my reach. This is a sin and im not ashamed to look practically pathetic and plainly stupid. Im tired of writing sexual fantasies and sending them to the person most important to me. not because I wouldn’t like any in reality, but because the more I think about it, the more I desperately want to search for him. My bad hobby brought me to the end of my rope to leap into the shallowness of my mind. And without strings attached I jumped in and dove in deeper. Without thinking. Just feeling. Forcing myself further, with no assurance of my return. This bad hobby, as may be unsounded to others, brings me to satisfaction, intellectually, spiritually; and giving consent for my material body to be degraded. Stimulate me to the heights of the farthest corner of space and time. I know of no other refuge. I know of no other salvation. It’s a one sided mirror and a tango with one foot. Less than one. Less than half. I ask of no forgiveness for being too addicted. This is my obsession and my demise. Pages of thoughts left unsaid. I blend in into the white background. Not knowing, not being known. My entity once evolved me, now I create the silence of a thousand leaves. And I shape my mind to knowing, condition my body into feeling. My bad hobby I shall never take away.
Yes, I am a sinner. I am crazy…and you are my bad hobby."

but i know now of one reality.. and it's not fatale. and that is life.. that is YOU!

----
notes: ~ illo above is one of my light paintings. read my theory about lights and how to paint using light.
~ 2004 post here
~ what im currently listening to: "underneath the stars" - the cure

amazing friendships and love

2008-10-09T14:00:00.004+09:00

here are more sugary sweetness for this week! below are two awards i received last week and i know its past my bedtime but i decided i cant let this day pass without updating this post.. not for one more day..

from the sweet and very creative yoon see
~ see the other amazing logos at her blog

and

from the amazing and adorable bella sinclair
and since this award should be passed on, i give this to seven friends who have been so sweet and amazing through these years..

1 - aravis ~ i so wanted to give her an award for "i love your art blog" last time but she was more on a novelist for me.. well that she writes about her life is simply amazing and her supportive and encouraging words to people are simply something that i love about her.

2 - angela ~ not only did art paved the way for us to cross paths, but so did youtube and myspace! (ha!) angela is very sweet and talented and she inspires me with her inner strength and beauty!

3 - floots ~ one of my oldest blog friends from way back when.. and never fail to amaze me with his inspiring poetry and photography..

4 - dennis villegas ~ its simply amazing how cyberspace can bring people together. his blog was an accidental click from one comment to another and when i realized, hey! he was my teacher in high school! and after more than a decade since we last saw each other, our blogs brought us closer than we had been then. thanks sir den, for being such an inspiration back then and now.

5 and 6 - neko and vina ~ i know this should count as one as they are synonymous to each other and although some friends may not be there always, if you think of such awards as these, special friends like them always have a place in my heart. coz not only that they share a love like no other but have something common with me and mine.

and the last and most special of all..

7 - ambres ~ of course! what more can i say? but if some people search for love, my advice is, he/she will come in the least expected but most perfect of time! i love you sweetie!

xoxo to you all!

If you would like to participate:

1.Put the logo on your blog.
2.Link to the person who gave you the award.
3.Nominate at least 7 other blogs.
4.Put links to those on your blog.
5.Leave a message on those blogs.

illo friday: sugary

2008-10-07T19:37:00.002+09:00

and of course what other place in the world would best suit a sugary sweet memory but in lovely Paris?

and this second attempt on watercolor is for my one and only.. my ambres!

happy moogie monthsary honey!

and above is the sugar-coated watercolor painting.. filled with cotton candy chewiness..

(well, ok ok its just enhanced thru picasa.. hehe)

----
sugary sweet paris
5" x 8" (orig.)
watercolor

paris.. sweet as cotton candy
5" x 8" (orig.)
watercolor, enhanced thru picasa

illo friday: packed

2008-09-29T20:21:00.005+09:00

to avoid a jam-packed holiday vacation..

.. go in November!
i actually find this painting funny! this is my first attempt in watercolor, ha! isay knows this.. and you may find familiar landmarks here..

hehe.. although its a mix of different beaches in the Philippines.. nonetheless let me give travelers out there a tip. if you want some peace and quiet on your vacation, go here during the lean season. some locations classify them during June to December 15 and peak seasons are Dec.16 to summer. (this part of the world tho, our summer is April and May). prices are cheaper.. hotel+airfare. can you imagine i was able to see a flight to somewhere in the south (i wont tell yet) from manila, which costs only about 1,600 per person!? to convert, 34 euros or $37 USD. And this is two-way! and some may say.. "that's peanuts!" lol..

sorry moogie.. *.* i just had to tell! hehe..

so, can anyone guess where this is?

----
my dream vacation
5" x 8" (orig.)
watercolor + liquid paper

i love your art blog awards

2008-09-24T04:39:00.006+09:00

so with the season of giving just lurking around the corner.. which also reminds me of my pending post cards and atc's that i should send out through snail mail.. i really hope the recipients are not pissed off already. i want to apologize and tell you that you are always on my mind.. i just didnt realize how difficult it is to find a place to print them all..

and as for the atc's tho, only one person will get the few that i have done so far, and he is gonna get it himself! hehe.. *.*

so while i am still on the hunt for a great quality printing shop, let me give out a badge award to those bloggers i love to visit and have even built friendships with.. despite being across oceans and time.

isay
alina chau
ascenderrisesabove
bella sinclair
bluerose
ces
ginger*:)*
indigene
orangefrute88
soulbrush
studio lolo
valgal art
willie baronet
yoon see
zari

and of course, to penelope who started illustration friday and illoluv who introduced the group to me!

to grab this award badge, copy and paste the following:

<a href="http://atomicvelvetsigh.blogspot.com/2008/09/i-love-your-art-blog-awards.html" title="I Love Your Art Blog Award" target="_blank"></a>

there are so much more people that i want to give out this award to but im summing up the first 17. i may be adding more on this post in the coming days..

so i am encouraging everyone to pass on the badge award to your blog friends who's artworks and words of encouragement inspire you and cheer you up as well. many may have not read how my blog used to be years back, but the gloom and doom have finally ceased from lurking over my life. the blog world and illustration friday has brought so many people together and some may not know that the simple uplifting words and comments from everyone has helped me pass through those dark days.. and helped me gain confidence, which was totally null before. that chapter of my life has been written and closed now. and bright lights and colorful years are surely ahead.

thank you to all.. actually, this badge is for everyone! feel free to place it on your blog, and award your friends too, just tell me so i can add your link here as well.

-----
update: here is an alternative, click here to get the badge. it will open on a new window. 8)

Illo Friday: Clique

2008-09-23T14:28:00.002+09:00

ring around the rosies
820 x 620 (orig.)
MS Paint

i remember when i used to play with the kids on our block.. how we play for hours after school, on weekends and whenever classes are suspended.. it doesn't matter if it rains or not. one of my favorite game was patintero (a traditional game where one team will all be "it" and would only step on the lines on our street while the other team should run fast and pass all the "its" and reach from one side to the other without being tagged by the "its").

we also used to play ring around the rosies, chinese garters and pretend restaurants or "house" (bahay-bahayan). in this game, we act like grown ups where our "food" are actually just leaves and twigs and stones.. somebody will play as a mom, a dad and the kids. i almost always wanted to be the mom because i used to be fond of collecting plastic utensils and plates and pack them all in a big box. thus the toys are mine so i wanted to be the one to take care of them.

then i reached 10 and being on 4th grade, classes are whole day unlike the previous years which lessens my time for play. and the boys tend to play more with sports like basketball, softball and skateboards. i knew i was a clumsy kid and i tend to fall on my knees alot so i slowly grew apart from them.

oh well those were the days.. back in the early 80's.. where playtime is totally different from now. cartoons on tv are just voltes V, daimos and smurfs. "other" shows for kids are only sesame street and batibot.

kids are more physical then and there were almost no mc donalds around. and, the simple joys of catching a beetle and grasshoppers were treasures. now if you ask an 8 year old what their treasures are.. they would say.. xbox, playstation and wii.

what do they want for chirstmas or their birthday? a cellphone with a camera and/or a laptop.

*sigh*

Moody Monday + Photo Friday

2008-09-19T23:58:00.005+09:00

last week's photo friday's topic was "relationship"
this week's photo friday is "the extraordinary"
this moody monday's topic is "love"

so let me sum up these three themes into one..

an extraordinary love and relationship..

growing up romanticized with classic novels and literature.. it has been a dream for me to fall inlove in Paris - one of the most romantic places in the world if not the most. and i.. living on the other side of the world.. who would expect it something like this would come true?

about 3 and a half years ago, two wandering souls unexpectedly met and floated in the clouds of Paris.. despite the distance, they were inseparable since..

seven months ago i was awed by this photo and thus added it as a fave on flickr..

in a few hours the inspiration materialized thru my hands as i drew this..

weeks after that we found ourselves in the exact same spot..

unplanned.

but inevitable.

so now.. would you believe that dreams can come true?

yes they do. if you hold on to it.. and take the leap.

i am a living testimony.

actually, we are *.*

calling all paintaholics!

2008-09-16T16:02:00.000+09:00

there is a new art challenge for all those who love to paint! Different Strokes from Different Folks

the rules are simple. one photograph will be posted every Wednesday and the goal is to paint or draw the scene, or etch it your way.. but sorry - no digital interpretations. so as for me, i should buy a new set of painting stuff then.

oh well, this is only their second week so let's give it a shot! here's this week's topic: Rehoboth Beach Landscape. here's my entry..

and of course i cant resist to make a digital version. here's the style i've been working on in the last 2 weeks..

i know! this is nothing compared to the entries there! well they are welcome to all artists who would like to join!

and so i recommend that everyone should see it! and for those who loves to paint regardless of being a pro or not, you can check out their blog and try it!

-----
(1) rehoboth beach landscape challenge, 2.5" x 4" (inches)
green gel pen on paper

(2) rehoboth beach digital, 970 x 720 pixels
green gel pen on paper
colors added thru picasa

illo friday: island

2008-09-15T10:09:00.006+09:00

netherlands is made up of man-made islands ?
610 x 840 pixels
drawn on a 6 x 9 cm. paper
edited thru picasa, colors thru ms paint

He *.* mentioned to me before that there were plans in the netherlands to create a tulip-shaped island off the coast of a certain city that is visible from the moon.

now i need to verify this information coz i cant find it anywhere on the net (handicapped by my poor searching skills) plus my dsl connection was down (again!) earlier.

he also mentioned something about a cannabis-shaped island! imagine how it would look like.. a weed leaf shaped island! gee what a trademark! and i used to correct people that they should not immediately associate holland with weed. lol..

saying goodbye to outdated links

2008-09-12T15:26:00.007+09:00

i have been trying to change my template for days and i know i have links (esp on my blogroll) which dates back to 2004, when i first started blogging. gee! its been what? 4 years already!

unfortunately not all my friends since then are still active in the cyberworld. or then again, have already changed locations..

as much as i want to keep them on my list (maybe they decide to put their sites back) i have too much going on at my sidebars that i need to lessen the activity. aside from that, i have this pop up thingy that i cant seem to remove lol. its adbrite's fault. oh well i havent opened my account there in ages! so thats another thing to add to my "to do list".

but here goes the links that i shall remove from my sidebar. the minimum time frame for me to classify them as outdated is if they havent touched their blogs/sites for 6 months or more.

::Directories::
Pinoy Top 100
onbloglist blog ranking
(additional dead directories are still being reviewed)

:: Literature ::
A Warrior's Tale
Silk
Veracity
.:A:.
.:A:.(2)
Aristocrat i
Aristocrat ii
poeticmermaid
A Neutral World?
atomic poet
bluesky tavern
c. asbury
easywriter
feminine expressions
haunted house dressing
indie ronron
lost in thought
make me hurt
melancholy of sorrow x
mystique
temppixie
maxwebber
The Grey Scribe

::Illustration Friday Folks::
Anonymous
Forever Young
Mick Mather
Paula
Rowantree
Shane Garton

:: Visuals & Art Blogs ::
Kadriorg
playing with light
Day Painter
a painting a day
a real jewel
bob doodles
brooks
chaotic paradox
glowing minds
glowsintime
jorgen's photos
photobee
shutter junkie
tricki
funny news
people you might meet online

:: Pinoys around the world ::
LadyWhiteSpirit
Chaos meets Deity
my kid cousin
Nalagblog
bagoong ave.
faux seriousness
no penny
poems of a worm
singulare
twisted illusions
Twisted Jessica

:: Music ::
posture
joyzipper
Radio indie pop
Playtunes.net
X FM

:: Shoutbox Deities ::
hdamnation
vryce
Hazbro
coast2coast
biologisvensk
captain jeff
fofusa
kirkkitsch
weinerdog
kelly
CapnPlaty
LukaQuinn
PureMood
MCfairy
SBwisdom
Ragdolls Customs
the Burning Question

i visited them one by one and placed a comment on their last post. (if i do not end up in a 404-page) some of them used to be really great blogs. strangely, a few tho ended up owned by somebody else or the owner suddenly felt its better to have a spam blog.

and i now remember how blogexplosion used to be so fun. now they have totally blown out of proportion when it comes to blog counts. i dont even go to the shotbox anymore. it's too crowded. but if you wanna drive traffic to your blog, thats one of the best ways i guess lol. anyways..

as Robert Smith sings "this wonder always leaves, the time always comes to say goodbye.. and this tide always turns.."*

i guess i wont easily get tired of blogging. let's see tho in another 4 years time?
-----
note: *line from "Bloodflowers" - by the Cure

illo friday: clutter

2008-09-09T19:31:00.007+09:00

in between my cluttered life and daydreaming.. i have you *.*

in my room
980 x 760 pixels
drawn on a 6 x 9 cm. paper
edited thru picasa, colors thru ms paint

In Your Room - Devics

In my room did you care
I never knew anyone who stared at me
Quite like the way your staring at me now
And if all these empty words you speak
Could change the boy who's at your feet
I think you need not look farther than your arms
Cause I'll never change
And you'll stay the same
And I'll never change

If I could change the boy at my feet
To a man who didn't have to speak
I wouldn't have to use my arms to measure
Something about the room that day
And how I knew I'd go away
Now all I can do is stare at you
And think what I'm about to do
Cause I'll never change
And you'll stay the same
And I'll never change

I stared at the light too long
And I did everything to keep from falling
When all is said and done
Do you think it was worth it
Patterns move across the floor
And it just doesn't feel the same I'm sorry
When all is said and done
I think it was worth it
Cause I'll never change
And you'll stay the same
And I'll never change

-----
music note: such a lovely song sung by a duet..

memories of rotterdam maart 18, 2008

2008-08-31T23:23:00.008+09:00

i was there with the perfect boy..
het was mooi..

The Cure
4 tour

March 18, 2008, tuesday
Ahoy, Rotterdam, The Netherlands

*just look closely and you might see Robert Smith and Simon Gallup..

for those who saw this posty earlier this week, sorry i wont be updating this post. i shall write what happened at the cure concert maybe someday soon. so let me just float with the memory for now.. hee!

illo friday: memories

2008-08-29T22:00:00.002+09:00

view from my cube
970 x 670 pixels
drawn on a 6 x 9 cm. paper
edited thru picasa, colors thru ms pain

..the things that i see each day.. are all nothing.. my memories are the ones i am holding on to.. so wake me from this dream.. for reality is only the time i am with you.. *.*

THE PERFECT BOY - The Cure

“YOU AND ME ARE THE WORLD”
SHE SAID
“NOTHING ELSE IS REAL
THE TWO OF US IS ALL THERE IS
THE REST IS JUST A DREAM…
ALWAYS MEANT TO BE
I CAN FEEL IT
LIKE A DESTINY THING
WRITTEN IN THE STARS
INESCAPABLE FATE
Yeah IT’S OUT OF MY HANDS
FALLING INTO YOUR ARMS”

“AND I DON’T WANT TO GET INNOCENT
BUT I WOULD LOVE YOU TO TAKE MY TIME
WE'RE ON THE EDGE OF A BEAUTIFUL THING”
SHE SAID
“COME ON…
LET’S STAY HERE FOR A WHILE”

Oh GIRL!
HE IS THE ONE FOR SURE
Oh GIRL!
HE IS THE PERFECT BOY

“Yeah ME AND YOU ARE A WORLD”
HE SAID
“BUT NOT THE ONLY ONE I NEED
THE TWO OF US IS NEVER ALL THERE IS
THAT DOESN’T HAPPEN FOR REAL
IF IT WAS MEANT TO BE US
IT WAS MEANT TO BE NOW
DON’T SEE THE SENSE IN WASTING TIME
IF YOU’RE SO SURE ABOUT THIS
LAUREL KISMET HARDY THING
YOU KNOW TONIGHT YOU’RE MINE”

“AND I DON’T WANT TO GET OBVIOUS
BUT I HAVE TO BE GONE BY THREE
WERE ON THE EDGE OF A BEAUTIFUL THING”
HE SAID
“SO COME ON…
JUMP WITH ME”

Oh GIRL!
HE’S NOT THE ONE FOR SURE
Oh GIRL!
HE’S NOT SO WONDERFUL
Oh GIRL!
HE’S NOT THE ONE FOR SURE
Oh GIRL!
HE’S NOT THE PERFECT BOY AT ALL

“YOU AND ME ARE THE WORLD”
SHE SAYS
“NOTHING ELSE IS REAL
THE TWO OF US IS ALL THERE IS
THE REST IS JUST A DREAM… ”

AND HER HEART MAY BE BROKEN
A HUNDRED TIMES
BUT THE HURT WILL NEVER DESTROY
HER HOPE…

THE HAPPY EVER AFTER GIRL
ONE DAY FINDS THE PERFECT BOY

-----
note: gee.. robert smith couldnt be any more than perfect.. but he is! need i say more?

out now: "the perfect boy" latest album of the cure | watch the video

please petition to BPI Brits for Robert Smith to receive the Outstanding Contribution to Music Brit Award 2009 [sign the petition now]

illo friday: routine

2008-08-26T15:59:00.004+09:00

my routine soon as i wake up..

then my routine after that..

need i say more? lol..

oh except that i was so busy with my routines i forgot to post sooner that it was my birthday and i am giving virtual ice creams for all!

-----
(1) routine at home, 6 x 9 cm.
crayons and red gel pen on paper
additional colors added thru picasa

(2) routine at work, 6 x 9 cm.
green gel pen on paper
colors added thru picasa

for

Birthday Icecream for All!!!

2008-08-24T10:43:00.006+09:00

i guess im still old fashioned coz i like to be surprised on my birthday with a party, with cakes and ice cream, and balloons(?) ha! but i wouldnt have guessed that the longest birthday and most surprises i'll have is on my 28th!

it started last saturday when some of my colleagues and friends went to my house unexpectedly and drank our heart outs while watching some DVDs.

then i wished for more time to rest and poof! a long weekend came to me for the first 2 working days of the week was a holiday and we had no work. wednesday, a typhoon came and classes were suspended. and in the tropical country where i live, a rainy afternoon is the perfect climate to make the most insomniac of insomniacs sleep soundly.

imagine the buzzing of constant wind and water showering your roof silencing the noisy neighbors as its the perfect ingredient for immunity to their sound.. plus add the cold shivers that disintegrates the hot weather, blocking the sun's hot rays to pierce your window curtains. what a great gift!

thursday, a surprise song from all my colleagues rumbled the most silent corridors announcing it was my birthday and warm wishes and hugs came after that. its simply so sweet!

friday i brought some traditional filipino birthday food at work and to hear them liking what i cooked was so heart-warming and a great present all by itself.

saturday, after work (since i work at nights), my friends and i ate at my favorite mediterranean restaurant (mister kabob's) and they bought me ice cream for dessert!

after that i went to the mall with 3 of my friends and looked around for some gadgets. woah! 350 GB external hard drive for only 6,000php! (well i didnt buy it i was just stunned) lol.. i was canvassing a new set of computer speakers (preferably altec) but since i have a set of great sounding speakers from my component, a friend suggested to get a converter instead to have them hacked to the my pc. when i got home it worked! 8)

after lunch, one of my friends treated us for a movie and the only "decent" movies available are (1) star wars: the clone wars and (2) x-files: i want to believe. and since im the only geek in the group i had no choice but to go with the majority and saw x-files.

mulder was still sexy, and i was surprised to see him grow that beard! (lol) and scully.. well lets just say she lost some weight. but watching it indeed brings back memories.. although im not that satisfied with the film. (but this post is not a movie review so i leave those who havent seen it in suspense)

now its sunday and while writing this, im waiting for my pistachio cake to bake. my sister and brother and their families will be visiting and we will have lunch here at my house (it may extend to dinner too.. who knows!)

life is full of surprises! so and as for those visiting my blog.. here's a surprise too.. grab a cup and a spoon and dig in! here's a virtual ice cream for you all!!

and yeah, Happy Birthday to me! woeha..

and double scoops if you came from illustration friday

-----
note: this is also my entry for photofriday: old fashioned

illo friday: detach

2008-08-18T07:22:00.006+09:00

Be content with what you have,
rejoice in the way things are.
When you realize there is nothing lacking,
the whole world belongs to you. ~Lao Tzu

detached from bloom
2.5" x 3.5"
crayons and gel pen on paper

..how i wish it were that simple. if only i can detach myself from this busy busy life. all i ever want is to live simple and simply live..
with you *.*

this ATC is for my honey.. hope you get well soon..

illo friday: sail

2008-08-10T09:25:00.007+09:00

sailing with flower clouds
2.5" x 3.5"
crayons on paper

Legend of Woes

wandering sparks...
slow wind carried them away
thru drops and showers
the sun sadly lain

was it envy
of the lucid mirror
that it had cast away?
a drenched down
   slipping sledge;
calling unto the wind
as small waves reverberate
to traverse their malignant state

as they slide to a stagnant era
lost and forgotten
thru the journey of folded pages
covered by the crisp scent
of misplaced woes
and their gaunt desire --

     nothing but one
     nothing but sailing as one.

will they ever be together?
connected but with a string
    of unceasing dreams
woven between miles apart...

forever in the horizon
an imminent promise
a silver lining with countless knots
almost owning the starry sky
    almost reaching
      almost touching
    but remained covered
thriving with flourished clouds

and they whisper
a yearning -
carried by the floating sea
centuries apart may come
they continually ache --

    to be...

      nothing but one
      nothing but sailing as one.

-----
note: this is a poem i wrote back in 2005, read the funny comments here. also, both poem and art inspired by the distance of the sea and Odilon Redon..

oh, and yeah, this is my first ATC..

Photo Friday: Rough...

2008-08-08T15:07:00.002+09:00

There is no rough road that can stop us.

Mover and Shaker

He walked a journey that flattened the lands
with a frivolous continuality
    and an upending stance --

    Let me paint you from within
    and fill the drifting shapes of empty dreams

    A reddening twilight that touched the sea
    in shades where blackbirds wake the dawn

He swept aside a thousand pathways there
'til darkness in dusk were all gone

Staring to the radiance of what's to come
He sank into the clouds, he then float

Still into the echoes he sailed the wind
Erasing all doubts and soulless cries

Madness aflamed began to fly away
He brought rest to give strength to rise.

-----
note: sorry if this is a repost from an old entry for a defunct b&w challenge group..
i havent written any poems in a while.. and this one that i wrote more than two years ago just brings back memories..

Moody Monday: Schadenfreude

2008-08-04T15:30:00.005+09:00

Last march i went to The Netherlands. for those who have been reading here for a while, remember my first post about the birds in franeker? [read here..] i planned on writing about my whole trip. and this is my second entry.

thuesday, march 25, 2008, paris.

due to my short vacation, we can only go to one country outside Holland. and since it has always been a dream for me to see Paris, we booked for a trip to go there. it was not a last minute decision, but unfortunately, we ran out of seats for a train, and even for a plane.

but a few days before my big flight, luck sided with as, for we were fortunate to have booked a bus tour despite the easter holiday. yes! we forgot.. it was easter! riding a bus was his last resort, well next to a long drive, but i told him its perfectly fine. at least we had a tour guide. although on the whole trip, the tour guide was speaking only in dutch. so being the only asian in the bus, who can only speak 2 languages, poor moogie, he had to translate everything! well at least the interesting ones. but imagine me, always asking, why are you all laughing? tssk..

anyway, the longest we could stay in Paris was only 4 days and 3 nights. so we have to make the most out of it. the first day was consumed by the bus trip alone, from amsterdam to belgium to france. but i reserve another post for that day.

on the second day, the first museum we went to was, of course, the Louvre! we planned on spending the whole day there. we also knew the places we wanted to see, we wanted to explore and get lost in paris, but our list of destinations was so long we cannot squeeze it all in for only 3 days.

he has been to the Louvre before, so he knew i'd definitely like it. according to him, there were so many rooms and exhibits that it would take a week to totally go and see each one. it was that huge! soon as we got there, we were totally thrilled. but.. yes.. here it is... it was a Tuesday.. and bad luck walked with us again, soon as we got to the glass pyramid, we were stunned. it was closed! i guess our excitement made us forget to check with the museum schedules..

we were not the only ones tho, as these people were expecting to get in as well. ha! lol..

oh well, off to musee d'orsay.. now that place made me cry. ha!

(to be continued..)

-----
note: this is my entry for moody monday: schadenfreude - satisfaction or pleasure felt at someone else's misfortune.

illo friday: canned

2008-07-29T20:46:00.006+09:00

and yes, of course! who else to inspire and influence a canned art, but Andy Warhol.. lol!

insomniac in a can
290 x 460
MS Paint

i never went to art school. my folks cant afford it then and always say there is no money in art. but i always loved art ever since i was a little girl. i drew on walls, notebooks, tables at school.. ha! but i never have kept a sketch book.

today i saw a post by racheal and this made me think twice of not having one. my job is not related to art in any way, but i sure need an escape sometimes and drawing and painting has always been my frustration. now should i consider myself a canned frustrated artist? lol..

illo friday: enough

2008-07-21T06:43:00.004+09:00

one moogie wish is never enough...
"always keep that moogie smile"

and let me just get rid this song out of my head (lol)..

Never Enough - The Cure

However much I push it down
It's never enough
However much I push it around
It's never enough
However much I make it out
It's never enough
Never enough
However much I do

However big I ever feel
It's never enough
Whatever I do to make it real
It's never enough
In any way I try to speak
It's never enough
Never enough
However much I try to speak
It's never enough

However much I'm falling down
It's never enough
However much I'm falling out
It's never enough
Whatever smile I smile the most
It's never enough
Never enough
However I smile
I smile the most

So let me hold it up
Just one more go
Holding it up for just once more
One more time to fill it up
One more time to kill
But whatever I do
It's never enough
It's never enough

It's never enough

-----
note: i made this doodle while waiting in a hospital lobby.. listening to my ipod and coincidentally writing down the lyrics of this song. when i got home the topic for IF is enough.. what more can i ask for?

one moogie wish is never enough
108 x 248 mm (orig.) gel ink pens on paper

moody monday: sleepless

2008-07-07T15:07:00.001+09:00

moogie month-day seventh..

"All our dreams can come true if we have the courage
to pursue them." - Walt Disney

and yes, once again my insomnia attacks on a monday afternoon. i have work tonight so i must sleep, but i just can't.. i lay in bed and i can't clear my head of the memories of Paris..

i (we) have been daydreaming of going there for years, and finally, last march, it came true!

so for everyone out there, remember.. always dream! and hold on to those dreams, for you can't do it, unless you imagine it.

have a great week everyone..

especially to my moogie *.*

photo frames experiment

2008-07-06T11:45:00.001+09:00

i know i have skipped illo friday last week and i think i would be skipping this week as well. let's see with the coming days..

well, the reason why is because i am busy building a blog for my officemates where we can all upload photos, thoughts and announcements in one location. i'm not even half way done but i promised them i would only do this on my free time..

i made 19 cute little photo frames that are customized for each of my colleague. but, what the heck! let me just share it to all.

pink hearts | pink make-up | red lipstick | butterfly & daisies

patrick pin | lavander stars | moogie moon | guitar on blue

green abstract | fairy & flowers | weed camo | black swirls

blue tiles | blue clouds | flying balloon | blue stars (mine)

brown girls | bunch o'smileys | double piano

my fave is the blue stars. i will be using that for my photo.

click the image and it will open in a new tab. feel free to grab anything you like. don't forget to tell me what you think! like what do i need to improve on etc.. comments and suggestions are very much welcome..

in memory of a friend

2008-07-01T17:35:00.008+09:00

I can't stop crying today at a loss of a dear friend. And I didn't knew sooner..

Even though I met Deity from online, she is one of the few whom I trust with my non-anonymous life. And in keeping some things private, let's just say, we have so much in common, and one is we both maintain a long distance relationship with a loved one. So in so many ways, I feel her pain. But I couldn't bear to imagine what she feels now especially when she heard the news about Chaos. And I, am still but at a loss for words.

All I can say is, if it were me in her shoes, I can't imagine how I'd live my life.

Dear friends,
Please take a moment to pray for the soul of a dearly departed, a fellow blogger, poet, artist and friend... Curtis aka Chaos. And for Deity, that her wounds may heal soon..

Deity, we are all here for you. I do pray that you can move on, and live the way Chaos would want you to live and love life.

---
note: please visit The Wandering Deity's Worlds.. Blogger | Multiply

illo friday: hoard

2008-06-25T20:17:00.006+09:00

emptiness inside

behind that big mask
all that he ever wanted
was to hoard her smiles

but he is just
so far away...

emptiness inside
560 x 730 (orig.)
MS Paint

illo friday: punchline

2008-06-14T06:10:00.010+09:00

feed me with your kiss..

the velvet kiss
1000 x 777 (orig.)
digitally altered photo on picasa

illo friday: forgotten

2008-06-07T23:55:00.003+09:00

the only solution to avoid forgetting the places you've visited..
is to take pictures. or draw. or both.

no place left forgotten
900 x 450 (orig.)
photo collage on MS Paint
(colors added thru picasa)

moogie seventh honey!!

illo friday: baby

2008-06-01T10:08:00.006+09:00

"Shift work sleep disorder is a sleep disorder which affects people who change their work or sleep schedules frequently
or work longterm on other than the day shift.

Such recurrent interruption of sleep patterns may result in
insomnia and/or excessive sleepiness." - wikipedia

in dreams
515 x 630 (orig.)
MS Paint

i think i have this disorder. no, i really do have this. but is there a cure?

working at night, sleeping at day (or at least trying to sleep). this is my routine during weekdays for the past 3 years. and prior to my night job, i have insomnia. and it was not bothering me at all.

i can read, draw, surf online, watch a movie and do more, while everyone else is sleeping and nobody is disturbing me. i move carefully tho for i dont wanna wake up or disturb anybody as well. so, no noisy neighbors playing their boom boom music or people shouting, talking loud, babies crying, kids playing on the street. blah! it's more peaceful this way.

and when i got my job on a night shift, i thought it was perfect! for three years, i have never felt sleepy at work more than 5 times. and the days i felt sleepy was due to totally not having sleep at all during day, which is very very rare and one was because i was sick and still at work.

my normal sleep takes only about 4-6 hours and when i exceed 8, i suffer from headaches soon as i wake up. i know its not the standard sleeping hours, but who is normal nowadays?

recently tho i noticed that i only have insomnia during weekdays, and sleep loong looong hours during weekends. there was a time that i even slept the whole day. yes, as in 17 hours or so! tssk, it was not productive. but i did not have any headache when i woke up. strange! and i woke up sometime around 2am to 4am. sleep like this makes my weekend fly by quickly until its monday again and i have to work again. geesh! i hated that.

yesterday, i went to bed at 4pm and slept the whole night. i woke up around 2am and im about to go back to bed after i post this. yes i know i have abnormal sleep. but how can i help it if im sleepy right now?! ha! let's see if i sleep long like a baby, or like a baby - waking up at the slightest noise.

i'll update tomorrow. moogie dreams everyone! night night..

---
helpful reads:
inosmnia | dyssomnia | parasomnia

Photo Friday: Difficult shot

2008-05-27T08:26:00.003+09:00

here's my plan: i'll be collecting my posts about my vacation in europe, if ever i finish writing it all down, and have the links in one post. i may be posting them not in chronological order as i luv remembering things as they strike me

i lost track of the holy week. we chose the perfect season for a vacation. we based it all on when the cure will have their concert, then reserved the first weekend flight to Amsterdam.

Prior to the flight, i wanted a day to day journal, i even bought a small scrap notebook, but i had no step by step plans, no schedule to strictly follow, nothing but pure adventure and unconditional trust to my tour guide *.*

Thus, i let each day pass with spontaneity. i lost track of my plan to write down a diary, but thats the least of my worries. in fact, i had no worries at all.

so, this will be my first entry.
maundy thursday, march 20, 2008, franeker.

After our afternoon walk (dont forget the fotoshoots - lol) in the streets of Franeker, and an early dinner of dutch food, he said he has a surprise for me. we rode his bike to a park. you have to cross a short footbridge to enter and a tall iron arch gate awaits at the other end. the park has a pond in the middle with about three species of ducks glazing by.

We were surrounded by trees waiting for spring, awaiting to bloom. the branches of the trees reflect their intricate details thru the water's pond, which in turn mirrors the faint dark hue of the sky. it was a beautiful scenery and i cant stop taking photos. wow it is a surprise! ..but that's not the surprise, he said.

sunset. he said i'll be seeing something that i may not have seen before at any moment. so i stood still, waiting. i felt the cool breeze pierce my layers and layers of coat, jacket and blouse. i smiled and closed my eyes raising my head up to feel the soft wind sliding thru my scarf, tickling my neck. the crisp air with the lingering smell of acorns and pine almost hypnotized me. then i heard something weird.

a distant growl of hisses chirping from afar, echoing in my ear. but as the echoes fade, i hear them coming closer by the second. so i opened my eyes and saw such an amazing sight.

and there they were. hundreds of swallows... no, thousands of them! floating in the air, flying over us.

they circled the park and went from tree to tree. they would settle on branches for a few seconds then fly away again.

later on, a new flock of birds from the opposite direction came flying towards them, like waves of the sea, only looking up, i saw how the groups merged into one. in a few seconds they fly going further like little black holes in the clear aqua blue sky. then, they separated again, in grace.

a ballet in the sky, as they dance with the wind. floating over us mortals who couldnt do anything but just look up, admire and be mesmerized. i was simply blown away, wide eyed and and bewildered! i have never seen so many birds fly so freely..

and yeah, it was difficult to take photos of them as more than half the time i was frozen on my toes in amazement.

---
note: all photos best viewed in large. especially the last one. this is my entry for photofriday's topic difficult shot.

illo friday: worry

2008-05-25T10:24:00.003+09:00

there is so much positive energy for this week's IF entries. well i broke my rule today as i went over to check some of my fave artists entries before doing mine. but i already have an idea before doing so. and here are some worries that i would luv for you to see..

first, i got worried about.. anon's missing parrot, jack (thanks to ces who made a tribute for him). i also got worried on how studiololo saw rude people living behind their cats, they just couldn't see how cats can be companions too, unlike sketched out. they can be like dogs too as they worry of having their owners leave them behind, just like Rat, the dog of valgalart.

yep, i worry like m heart. i also got bit worried of the people who swim too close to boats just like aynaku. what also worried me was the scary hand usually dreamt by kids, drawn by vhrsti. got scared too of the idea of not having ideas like rrramone. and although ginger's little girl is so worried of the frogs, it worried me more when she reminded us of global warming. and that ants should worry about it too, as shown to us by princess pepper cloud. so we all should spend a worry-free day, like what kathleen rietz drew, with our families and loved ones, while we are still alive!

reading about common worries and the positive comments by their visitors made me once again agree that there are still a lot of good people out there.

and, like the song of rbaird goes.. ..don't worry — be happy. in every life we have some trouble but when you worry you make it double..

this song helped me get over my greatest worry.. yes, the first thing that came to mind when i saw this week's topic was how i live so close to the most dangerous road in the philippines. the commonwealth avenue. (some even claim its the most dangerous road in south east asia)

worried about commonwealth ave
900 x 650 (orig.)
MS Paint collage

for more than 2 decades, i pass by this road and saw how it transformed. literally. it was once a long road of vacant lots and trees on numerous points, until they widened the road, and widened it some more. this meant, cutting down of trees and literally pulling them out off the ground. this also forced some squatters to leave their homes, and small shops to permanently close. gone are the vulcanizing shops, auto shops, barbers and salons, the goats doomed to be pinapaitan (a native delicacy), the palochina furniture makers, the videoke bars, beer bars and carinderias (small restaurants).

now we have a mall, a big church (st. peter church) which was inspired to be a replica of the basilica in rome, additional public and private schools (about 5, not including the university of the philippines), more buildings, a golf course and a golf driving range (separate locations), 3 call centers, plus an industrial science and technology park that is ongoing construction (said to be owned by about 5 huge corporations - IBM, HSBC, ABS-CBN etc).

now industry and destruction of the environment have its blow on us. im not really against progress here ok, but widening of road means more cars, more buses and all sorts of vehicles. more vehicles means more people gaining access. more people increases the accident rate. and sadly, not to mention, crime rate. well, it is the 2nd most populous suburb in the world, tied with Giza, Egypt and Incheon, Korea. only Yokohama, Japan is larger.

but the big danger is not because its where the house of representatives (where the congress holds its sessions) is located. but there was one news, about the data gathered from the police reports, that from August to September of last year alone, an average of two to three crimes and accidents happen in a week. this does not include the 'smaller' accidents and crimes that doesn't get reported, including over-speeding, small bumps on cars, pickpockets, etc. i even witnessed accidents (or its aftermath) almost every week last january to february. so im guessing the ratio will still be the same, or worse!

well this is not something to be proud of indeed. but fortunately for me, and thankfully, nothing has happened to me. and i pray that i'll still be safe. although i had a brother who got snatched of his mobile phone while in a bus without realizing it, and my dad's car was hit by a small truck when he was doing a u-turn at philcoa (found at the beginning of the avenue) thankfully, there were no injuries. but so far living here for more than 2 decades, that's it.

worrying is not the first thing that should overrule your mind. living here for so long, you just get used to it. but sometimes even though you are very careful, its just a matter of chance and being on the wrong place at a wrong time.

Illo Friday: Wide

2008-05-21T18:20:00.005+09:00

wide open sky
900 x 650 (orig.)
MS Paint

Achlum.. yep, Achlum again. my third illo for this city.

if i were to choose and re-live just one day of my stay in holland, i'll choose the day we went to achlum. of course i love all my days there (as short as it may have been) as each day was an adventure; with a new place to see, new museum to go to, new art to discover, new people to visit, new food to taste and new things to do.

this illo is based on a photo i took, as well as the other two:

well, what can i say? i just fell inlove with the place.. and fell inlove with my moogie *.* all over again..

Illo Friday: electricity

2008-05-11T07:44:00.006+09:00

i cant believe that a week just passed by so fast.. i wasnt even able to finish my illo for the topic "seed".. well ok, not even started with one. but i have the image in my mind until now.

so here goes a couple of camera paintings that is well suited.. but dont touch your screens or the electricity will stun you! };-}

when work eats you alive...

...you have to fight back or you're dead.

coz life without art is not life at all. you are just in autopilot.

illo friday: wrinkles

2008-04-25T23:41:00.006+09:00

we dont need sound to feel
we dont need sight to see
you can see from miles and miles
without the need to open your eyes

just pause for a while
to feel what we cant see
those glittering gray eyes
would walk with me thru eternity..

"in mint"
6" x 8" (orig.)
green gel pen sketch on recycled paper
[color added thru picassa]

-----
illo note: drawn while listening to The Cure's "Mint Car" on repeat mode.

illo friday: primitive

2008-04-19T01:29:00.012+09:00

a famous dutch quote -

"If the world will end, I would go to The Netherlands
because everything happens there 50 years later."

"achlum in blue"
6" x 8" (orig.)
black colored pencil sketch on recycled paper
[color added thru picassa]

A.W.O.L.

2008-04-14T20:26:00.006+09:00

the sunset is only the beginning

as i relive the dream of our past
in my mind i bathe
with the promises now showered and clear

i drink the wine of your fulfillment
as i untangle your gift
of once unfathomed desires

i am not afraid anymore
for fear is a snow drop
that melts as it hits the floor

and i lay myself on your warm hands
as you open the window
for us to see

come...
come soar with me now
as we unravel whats ahead
while the blue horizon changes its hue
shining at our every footstep
glistening to our wings

nothing is indeed impossible
as long as we hold on
to our dream...

-----
note: photo taken at Holland, poem written soon as i got back to Manila..

awol - yep, i owe my friends an update of where i am and how i've been. first, that i finally went to Holland and Paris. now im back and my head is still floating. please slap me i feel like im only dreaming..

villose velvet velvetine

2008-03-09T10:16:00.008+09:00

i found a meme from andrea and tho some find it easy i dont.. for there are just a handful of words i know offhand that starts with V..

anyway here goes..

> your name………………Velvet
> 4 letter word……………………vamp
> vehicle…………………………volkswagen (i used to drive one)
> city……………………………Versailles (i'll see you soon!)
> boy's name………………………vladimir (nabokov) or vincent (van gogh) who to choose? who to choose? lol..
> girl's name……………………vivianne
> alcoholic drink…………vodka!!
> occupation………………………ventriloquist
> something you wear……………victoria's secret (*giggles)
> celebrity……………………Vin Diesel (not that i like him.. he's just the only "v" celebrity i know lol)
> food…………vallée d’auge chicken receipe
> something found in a bathroom……valium (well, not in my bathroom that is..) lol
> reason for being late……………visa card! (oh no!)
> cartoon character……………… victor - one of three gargoyle statues at disney's hunchback of notre dame
> something you shout……………voot!
> animal………………………veery see photo
> body part……………………vertebra
> word to describe you……………velvety.. goodness.. (ha!)

this is very visive videndum, dont need to be verbatim or else suffer with verbomania.. hehe..
now i tag only two people: Ambres and YOU!

if YOU like to participate you can leave a comment to link to your post or just leave your answers at the splitting atoms section..

-----
illo note: this is a result of a portrait exchange with rrramone...

illo friday: garden

2008-03-07T23:27:00.005+09:00

Keep love in your heart. A life without it is like a sunless garden
when the flowers are dead. -Oscar Wilde

HAPPY THIRD ANNIVERSARY TO MY MOOGIE!

-----
note: here's an ms painting that i have done 2 years ago. click here [IF: spring] if you wanna see the progress of how it was made

Illo Friday: Leap

2008-03-03T17:17:00.001+09:00

"A dream you dream alone may be a dream, but
a dream two people dream together is a reality." - John Lennon

do you believe in dreams?

do you believe in fate?

he said

you'll never know unless you take the leap..

he leaped.

now

its

my turn..

dreaming of paris
5" x 8" (orig.)
pen and ink on recycled paper

12 days to go..

Moody Monday: Colorless + meme

2008-02-27T18:52:00.006+09:00

my world would be colorless without books
and lifeless without music

here's another tag for this week. isay passed the baton to me to post 5 random weird things about myself. i had done one of these before as i posted 5 weird habits.. but here's to add another 5 then!

6. i have more cds than books. and the photo above shows only a fraction of what i have.

7. i buy a book 90% of the time i pass by a bookstore. even though i have tons of other unread books calling for me in the middle of the night (well technically "day" because... read no.8)

8. i have insomnia and im up all night. thus i work at night and sleep at daytime. and my body clock only allows me to sleep for max of 5 hours or else i get a headache.

9. among my old high school peers (barkada), i used to be the quiet one. until i met them again a few years back and they were almost shocked that i was not as timid as they once knew. (*.* thanks!)

10. i am a geek and my hero is dexter.

now i tag: Anto | Teri C | Forever Young | Anonyrrie | Bluerose | Zari

-----
note: my entry for this week's moody monday ..my mood is not that colorless this week..

illo friday: multiple

2008-02-23T01:10:00.006+09:00

and aside from playing with my digital camera in the dark, im also fond of playing with ms paint and making collages from my paintings.

playing in the milky night
1155 x 775 (orig.)
MS Paint

love liefde mahal

2008-02-21T07:21:00.004+09:00

February is almost over and st. valentine's day have past. but a tag from a generous and artistic friend, zari, has inspired me and many others to remember the origin of this holiday. and to quote..

"St Valentine’s Day; a holiday named after various early Christian who became models of selfless love surviving in cruel circumstances. Yet nowadays, this holiday is mainly associated with romantic love; it is just a day to spend on chocolates, flowers, trips, lingerie, and romantic dates…I think it’s time we forget about this meaningless stuff to focus on the true meaning of this day; love, peace and global unity."

and as i have mentioned previously, love and giving should not be shown only in one day..

so share the love and spread the love to the world and join us..

Here are the simple rules:
1. If you get tagged or not (and want to play along), take some minutes to meditate about love and peace, pray for countries that are facing troubles, for those people you love and those you don’t

2. Write a post with links to blogs that you think would like to participate

3. Link to this post so that people can easily find the exact origin of the meme.

now i tag:
Ambres | Deity | Vina | Anto | Isay | Ayanku | Ces | Angela |
Annalee | Floots | Aravis | Ascender Rises Above | illoluv | The Unknown | and anyone who would love to participate..

Malapit na matapos ang Pebrero, at ang araw ni st. valentine ay nagdaan na. pero isang tag galing sa galante at malikhaing si zari ay nag(inspire) sakin at sa marami pang iba na maalala ang pinagmulan ng pagdiriwang na ito.

at tulad ng sinabi ko dati, ang pag-ibig at pagbibigay ay 'di dapat pinapadama sa iisang araw lang..

kaya't padama at ipamahagi ang pagmamahal at sumali sa'min..

illo friday: theory

2008-02-17T03:56:00.005+09:00

"The speed of light in a vacuum is the same for all observers, regardless of their relative motion or of the motion of the source of the light." -Albert Einstein

my theory about light is that it can be bended by extending time.

i cant decide on what image to post, but here are 3 more from the same series. i created them when i was watching disney on ice with my son. fun huh? whats your fave?

read more about:
speed of light, and
light painting (notice the links at the bottom?)

---
update: please visit share the looooooove for an art raffle.

share the looooooove!

2008-02-14T08:00:00.003+09:00

after a week off from work, another nice surprise awaited me.. some of you illo friday folks may have seen justZHM’s post for the topic 100% (link).. and yep, monica c link) and yours truly, are the lucky visitors to win the raffle.. 100% luck indeed!

what i got was a very cute bookmark! and zari was also kind enough to throw in a cool personalized post card!

Happy 2008 too, Zari!

i really luv illustration friday!

here’s an idea! i’d like to pass on this chain of IF creativity, i am having a raffle here as well. anyone interested should just drop a comment on this post and choose any artwork or photo found here at my blog. if you don’t want to choose, its fine.. just say so and i’ll be the one to pick one for you. whoever wins will get a post card or print out of your chosen artwork or photo and i will inform you by email or comment on your blog.

i would recommend to pass on the chain and give out something to a lucky visitor as well.

there is no exact closing date tho, but hopefully i will have the prize ready by the end of next week.

for giving is not only done on christmas and sharing the love is not only on valentines day…

Moogie Seventh Moonlight Kiss

2008-02-07T19:03:00.000+09:00

Illo Friday: Choose

Always choose to hold on to your dreams..
and if you firmly believe it,
it will come true.

sudden stars sudden kiss
800 x 650 (orig.)
MS Paint

*.*

"...Sudden Stars"
by: Stereolab

Sweet smelling
essences
hugs and smiles
sweet kisses
movements
towards me
embrace
reverie
tenderness
velvet skin
treasured dreams
intimate
silk and gold
nuit d'amour
naked soul

After such distance
Come to me, precious being, come to me
After such ennui
Come to me, delicious, enfold me
After such a long drought
Here a place for flowers to flourish

But if you must,
And if you must,
If you must go, go--

The wind will take you
It will lift you
Across the ocean

Into the sky
Towards the sun
It will take you, high--

So if you must,
And if you must,
If you must go, go--

Sweet smelling wind
Announcing
L'amour de ma vie
When you're ready
Mon bel amour
Simply come to me.

-----
update: also my entry for this week's illustration friday.

illo friday: blanket

2008-02-02T00:26:00.000+09:00

Wanted: a needle swift enough to sew this poem into a blanket. - Charles Simic

are we staring at nothing?
820 x 620 (orig.)
MS Paint

... or sew this blanket into a poem.
i am constantly having a writer's block. geesh.. i wonder why?
anyway, id luv to know what you see here.

and the countdown begins...

2008-01-27T08:46:00.000+09:00

yep.. a few more hours of sleeplessness awaits..

layoutcodez.net

see another version of the countdown here

Illo Friday

2008-01-25T19:21:00.000+09:00

Tales and Legends: Diwata

in philippine mythology, a "diwata" is a mythological figure similar to fairies or nymphs. they are said to reside in large trees, such as acacia and balete and are the guardian sprits of nature, bringing blessing or curses upon those who bring benefits or harm to the forests and mountains. it is a filipino spelling for the Sanskrit word devadha, but the name is ultimately derived from the Sanskrit word dev, meaning deity.

Maria Makiling is my favorite diwata. she is a guardian of the mountain, responsible for protecting its bounty and thus, is also a benefactor for the townspeople who depend on the mountain's resources. in addition to being a guardian of the mountain, some legends also identify Laguna bay - and the fish caught from it - as part of her domain.

it is often said that a mount in Laguna, Mt. Makiling, resembles a profile of a woman lying down which is believed to be that of Maria. this phenomenon is described as true from several different perspectives, so there is no single location associated with this claim. the mountain's various peaks are said to be Maria's face and two breasts, respectively, and her hair cascades downwards a gentle slope away from her body.

----
note: this is my camera painting post for
read more about maria makiling

illo friday: plain

2008-01-19T09:19:00.000+09:00

i had an interview before
and results just came in..
the agony of waiting is almost
over.. on second thought.. a few more days
of nerve racking excitement shall consume me.
but
how can i endure more days? if i am
there
would it be true?
how could i know reality from not? how
could i be there but really be here?
how
could i be here but be there?
maybe
in dreaming of being ..
under your roof.. Flatlands around..
cows.. water.. rain..
cold..
and.. you...
*.*

"there but not here"
4" x 5" (orig.)
sketch on recycled paper
[color added thru picassa]

Illo Friday: Stitch

2008-01-13T11:33:00.000+09:00

The Womb

I have a 3-inched stitch
from below my navel running down
for six years now.

this dark brown, reddish thick skin line
is a symbol, a reminder,
of the reason why i try so hard -

breaking my bones
stretching my veins
and splitting time in nano-seconds

and i would trade everything

just to see -
that astonished stare
ice melting smile
running to me.

and to feel -
that heartskipping warmth
of those arms wrapped around me.

and to hear -
the words that will shatter all walls
stop all the wars in the world..

"i love you, mommy"

-----
note: as of the moment of posting, flickr was down so the image was temporarily stored somewhere else. soon as flickr is up, the image will be transfered there.

Photo Friday: Mountain

2008-01-11T16:09:00.000+09:00

i would only love
to sleep now if i wake up
and go here, not work

---
for this week's PhotoFriday
update: also my entry for Moody Monday: Lofty

Illo Friday: 100%

2008-01-06T17:49:00.000+09:00

100% camera painting... [definition]

100% - Sonic Youth

I can never forget you - the way you rock the girls
They move a world and love you - a blast in the underworld
I stick a knife in my head - thinking bout your eyes
But now that you been shot dead - Ive got a new surprise

I been waitin for you just to say
Hes off to check his mind
But all I know is you got no money
But thats got nothing to do with a good time

Can you forgive the boy who - shot you in the head
Or should you get a gun and - go and get revenge?
A 100% of my love - up to you true star
Its hard to believe you took off - I always thought youd go far

But Ive been around the world a million times
And all you men are slime
Its the gun to my head, goodbye I am dead
Wastewood rockers is time for cryin, hey!

----
update: just found today my old tapes of sonic youth and im sound trippin'.. remembering the time i saw them live here in manila when i was only 13. and note that they took the adventure of the daily commute - and rode a jeepney! woah such a great band.. i always loved thurston moore.. [see him on his estatic peace! label]

miss them too? visit their official website for updates: Sonic Youth

Illo Friday: little things

2007-12-11T02:43:00.000+09:00

little things when in great numbers
can move and shape the planet

please save our seas...

what have you done for mother earth lately?

"we are mere little things to them"
800 x 510
MS Paint

i support

photo friday: dead of night

2007-12-04T03:54:00.000+09:00

Night Light

night light
i beam
i stare
as i move about
one step
from yet another
counting all the pines
counting all the signs
in an aviery of shadows
a burst of stars
the crash of waves
the fading sun
a warrior going down
now all spirits take flight
and wander through the night

night lights
i hover
i spare
a second gone with you
the silk of your blanket
i wrap me with stars
as the wind flew about
another moondust
another dawn's dusk
through rooftops
i look down
and how your brilliance
shine
above everything else...
above everything.

atomicvelvetsigh © 04.21.05

the things i miss

2007-11-28T10:20:00.000+09:00

"I think we dream so we dont have to be apart so long. If we're in each others deams, we can be together all the time." - PDV

1. wake up, smoke, and miss you
2. shower, smoke, and miss you
3. do some stuff, smoke, and miss you
4. eat brunch, smoke, and miss you
5. shuffle stuff, smoke, and miss you
6. gaze at stars, smoke, and miss you
7. eat dinner, smoke, and miss you
8. watch tv, smoke, and miss you
9. listen to music, smoke, and miss you
10. read and write something, smoke, and miss you
11. go online, download, smoke, and miss you
12. dream of skydiving in paris, smoke, and miss you
13. think of more things, smoke a few more, and miss you
14. go to bed, smoke, and miss you

14 things, divide them in two and half of me is you.. in tribute to my blog turning 3, those are the things that i miss and were once me.. now everything is busy but despite that i still miss you..

will we ever dream of paris again? ca va?

-----
photo credit: "Paris" by Aerial Photos

photo friday: travel

2007-11-22T07:52:00.000+09:00

b.l.a.n.k.

i wake up
darkness around me
five seconds before the alarm rings
i pretend to not hear
but it comes echoing in my head
in the dungeon of my desires
i long to sink beneath the sheets
to melt with the fresh breath of another twilight
that is another day for me
and the other side of the world
but i have no choice
choices are left for the resilient
and i am not as free
and nothing is altered by staying
so the mist lifts me
as i drag my nerves to rake the cold floor
every step further from tranquility
along with my soul that sleeps with the sound
burning the thread of where i travel
as it denies another window to open
so can you -
help me banish the void
that recurs on the sundown
of my shortened years?
no, i know. there’s nothing
that i can even do
but concede on
and embrace it.

at
least
embrace it
with
you.

---
photo notes: this post is my entry for this week's PhotoFriday. and since i cant decide on which image to attach the poem i wrote, might as well have them both.

Illo Friday: Scale

2007-11-13T18:47:00.000+09:00

i was stunned this morning to find out that there was already 350 entries to this week's illustration friday. and gosh its only monday!! did i went awol that long?! my ttlb rank even fell to a microorganism! waah!

but while all the IF folks posted a fish scale or a weighing scale.. or something out of the ordinary.. a picasso-ish abstract, a playful kinder art, a graffiti, a growing mustache or whatnot, i thought of posting this old illo that is collecting micro dust from my archived files.

yeah it was suppose to be a reciprocal portrait but some people are just too busy (which includes me!)

so here yah go.. hope you can guess who this is before clicking the last image.

"portrait of a man named ..."
930 x 630 (orig.)
MS Paint

10 things i hate

2007-11-12T12:53:00.000+09:00

Deity.. the goddess of beauty and light... tagged everybody who lurks under her radiance.. and since i hardly have time for anything.. why not make this post an escape from all the “chaos” of work. (erm, not your chaos, deity) and as a special additive, why not make this meme a list of 10 things i hate and love and just hate and just love? confused? erm so am i, i think. Coz this was way past due…

Food: love and hate - street food – and I found the perfect blog who posted them all. [sari-sari store] tho i love the salty red egg, after seeing the pics on how it was made, erm.. i sorta changed my mind now. but i still love chicharon, quail eggs, pork isaw, fish/squidballs.. basically all those posted there except for erm.. addidas (chikcen feet), betamax (blood hardened and shaped in rectangular) and one day old chick! for the untrained eyes, those pics may all look gross.. but i love to eat them except the last 3 that i mentioned.

Fruits: only love - actually, contrary to deity, i love star apple. (known as “kaimito” in our native tongue) [wiki-kaimito] i also love mangoes – fresh to dried to green to ripe.. from the smell of the skin down to the last drop of juice from the seed’s edges!

only hate - what else than durian!!! god i hate the smell of this and awk! the taste is more awful than its odor! [durian]

Veggies: love and hate - potatoes.. i love it in any way you cook it. strangely, except for potato salad. i don’t really hate potato salad but i just don’t fancy them. just give me something else.

and what veggies do i only hate? saluyot! (aka jew’s mellow – i only knew this now as i searched for a pic of it online) it’s a stringbean-like veggie where you do not eat the skin but you have to suck out all the juice and seeds out from it’s sides! eew the slimy gooey texture mixed with a sour taste is terrible!

People: love and hate what i hate the most are people who get so pissed off in the most minuscule of reasons! and add that they express it to everyone as if there is no tomorrow because his temper will crack the planet in half! haha.. and of course i looovvvee everything that is opposite of that.

oh, and yeah, dont ask me how come i know so much about this.

Event/Situation/Incident: love and hate - i hate the waiting that kills… tho love it if all the waiting is worth it. *wink *.*

TV shows/movies: only hate I hate stupid reality shows and dramatic soap-operas... erm, let me re-phrase that. i hate reality shows and soap operas. they are all stupid. and i dont wanna choose sitting on that couch watching mind-numbing sprit-crushing game shows, stuffing fucking junk food into your mouth*.. no wonder some people are so full of shit, they watch too much crap on TV. haha.. pardon my… eh, do i need to ask for apologies for saying this?

only love - Discovery channel and National Geographic. (yeah how geekish can one get?)

Music: love and hate again, contrary to what’s popular, i love music with incomprehensible lyrics and drowning noise or ambient tones like whispering vocals eaten by noisy guitar drones. although i hate it when i don’t find a CD of it from tower records.

and to answer the question.. “can anyone really enjoy music with the vocalist mumbling something like a voodoo curse?” --> yep..

Household chores: love and hate geesh.. does everybody hate doing the laundry, too? although, i’d trade my mountain of laundry to your pile of dishes anytime!

Thing/s around the world: love and hate i love the city where i live in, but hate it as it has the most dangerous road in south east asia (!) and dubbed as “the death zone of manila” – which i pass everyday going to and from work. (!)

Thing/s about myself: love and hate i love to think but i hate having ideas… and not having time to write, then all of a sudden have time to write and the ideas i formerly had disappears into the warp zone of my subconscious. (like now. i know i had better answers before.. eh months ago, when i first read this meme at Deity’s blog.)

So thanks for the wonderful ride back to memory lane deity.. hehe.. now let me go back to my busy sked before my boss comes back and catches me “unblocking” my internet connection. Hahah!!

Thanks for reading! And as for the tags, whoever reads this may answer the same “love-hate” questions and don’t forget to leave a comment for your link.

-----
*note: if this line sounds familiar... yep, got it from the movie trainspotting

photo friday: fantasy

2007-09-20T10:06:00.000+09:00

DARKNESS FELL :: Wolfgang

And so she woke up from a dream
That was beautiful starry and so wild
It was all still clear in her eyes
And though her mind was foggy
And blank she wondered why
Her life couldn't be as lovely
it was time...
There was this king he had no castle or throne
But his horse was great and white
He rode alone and liked it that way
But when he met her he swore
He would never leave her side...
They rode across the land
Two lovers hand in hand
And no danger could come near
And when something made her cry
She'd look at him teary eyed
And he would make her feel better
Oh so much better so much better than before
And now this forest was their home
It was a night time
And the right time for love
In the dark
She placed her hand upon his chest
And all the rest just flowed
Makin' love down under an ancient far away night
It was so grand just holdin' someone's hand
And now safety came naturally
It was so clear that she would never
ever have to fear
Oh tell me a story of magic and spiraling ships
And stars in the night
Just whisper in my ears
Make it soft but make it clear
I want to hear every breath you say
He placed his hand upon her breast
But she woke up from the land
Tears falling in her hands
As she looked up askin' why
She laid back in her bed
Thoughts raising in her head
Why can't my life be beautiful she said
As she closed her eyes again
Just prayin' he'd return
But only Darkness Fell upon her...

-----
note: Last Song Syndrome aka LSS - have you ever heard a song in your head on repeat mode you almost hear yourself sing? that it was so glued to your head you humm it even while sleeping? i did.. and the song above is the culprit. };-}

moogie kissses

2007-09-07T03:07:00.000+09:00

what a nice surprise...

"I think we dream so we
dont have to be apart so long.
If we're in each others deams,
we can be together all the time."

M O O G I E S E V E N T H !

-----
update: added to topic: sugary

Photo Friday: insignificant

2007-08-31T20:05:00.001+09:00

yes i believe that faith sees the invisible, believes the incredible and receives the impossible.. but tonight, i feel faith's insignificance as all the world around me revolves but me.

PhotoFriday: Unfinished

2007-08-29T18:15:00.000+09:00

Today, in the deepest abyss of my loneliness,
in the endless pit I am falling into,
a rope suddenly surfaced
from the tedious plummet of my decline.

A rope that was hanging from some two years ago.
A forgotten page from my past,
from a wrecked book that I buried
with my hopes, with my passion.

Thoughts clash within me
as an argument linger in mind stating
that nothing is impossible,
but with the premise
that nothing is real.

I have met a destiny
that once opened the doors
for the resurrection of
the unrevealed madness in me.

And now that a tragedie is engulfing me,
preventing me to settle down
in the confines of my clouded dreams,
I extended my arms and reached for the rope.

An attempt that I know
would scorn others
and hurt my own being.
But I need to know.
I had the urge to seek.

In the restlessness of my dawdling fall,
I needed to feel the roughness,
the tangles, and the tightness of this rope.
I need to know that it is safe.
That it is going to be ok.

So forgive me if I held it
and even slowed down my fall.
But in so doing, I shall not tie a knot.
It shall not halt what I am destined to fulfill.

Now I am ready to face my truth,
and that is to plunge into my own demise,
my own death.
That in dying, one’s destiny is fulfilled,
one’s sorrow is finally eradicated.
And that the sorrows that strike others
will fade out with time.
And there shall be
no more unfinished business.

Illo Friday: Visitors

2007-08-27T05:00:00.000+09:00

"walking thru the time machine"
a camera painting

i used to watch a tv series entitled “sliders” where a group of unlikely strangers got sucked into a warp vortex where they “slide” through parallel dimensions or universes. they were sliding from one world to another in an endless search back home. [read about it here]

what if there are really worlds parallel to ours? will there be another velvet living in a better world? or worse? would i ever switch places with her? or is her world a nice place to visit but would i like to live there? would she like to live here?

Photo Friday: Old

2007-08-22T15:07:00.000+09:00

"It haunts me, the passage of time.
I think time is a merciless thing.
I think life is a process of burning oneself out
and time is the fire that burns you" - Tennessee Williams

today is my birthday..
and how i would love
to escape from
my busy city life..

-----
note: photo taken at the highest point of Tagaytay last year.. if i could only re-live that day, i won't change anything.. except to make time longer..

Illo Friday: Captain

2007-08-19T05:00:00.000+09:00

O Captain, My Captain..

Papers flying overhead crawled up as a ball or folded as an airplane. A scream came from the front-seated girls as they giggle and talk about their summer puppy loves and silly boys from the school next to ours. A girl showing off a new gadget her dad from abroad just sent, while on-lookers awed with admiration. Another girl ran after somebody who was laughing and skipping across the room, apparently she took something from her. And I, sitting by the back row doodling on the back page of my newly bought notebook, grinned. An abrupt pause almost numbed my ears, being used to the chaos of the room, I raised my head wondering why everyone went quiet.

“I wish I could stand on my desk and look at you all,” a modulated low voiced man in a Hawaiian shirt came walking in the classroom. “Good morning class. I am professor Villegas and this is Economics. If this subject won’t change your life, I will. Dead poet’s honor.” These were the first words my Eco prof said back in junior year. He was a new teacher and that was a pretty brave dare on the first day of classes to the labeled “notorious section”.

I remember he laughed after he said he will change our lives, and the class laughed with him, in a sarcastic way. As the students were laughing I was able to jot down his last phrase, not knowing what he meant back then. I also remember that the first class activity was not about economics. Instead, we watched a movie, and the title, he didn’t disclose until we actually watched and read the screen. It was Dead Poet’s Society.

It probably had different effects on each student as some “fell inlove” with Ethan Hawke and some, the other actors. In my case, I fell inlove with the film and the character John Keating – A professor that inspired his students to a love of poetry and to seize the day. This film has influenced me in ways that I never realized until after some years after. Aside from my being fond of “men older than me”, (hehehe) I was also inclined to reading classic literature and poetry.

“Carpe Diem” was the popular expression of our class then and even after that school year, we call Prof. Villegas “Captain” and joked with him on the lines “O Captain, O Captain”. Although the tagged “notorious class” was not removed, I later learned that we were the only class where he showed that movie. Our only regret was that we can’t literally stand on our desks and tear out the pages of our school textbooks. Ha! Those who have seen the film will know why.

I guess the petty meanings were the things that sufficed while growing up having that as one of the hundreds, thousands… of experiences piled at the back of my mind. But looking back now, I must agree that a great part of my personality was somehow influenced by that past. And thinking of our brains as a puzzle, missing one piece will literally won’t make it complete.

Now, I stand upon my desk to remind myself that we must constantly look at things in a different way. O captain, my captain… thank you.

"looking inside a dreamer's dream"
900 x 600 (orig.)
MS Paint + Picassa

O Captain My Captain
by: Walt Whitman
O Captain my Captain! our fearful trip is done,
The ship has weathered every rack, the prize we sought is won,
The port is near, the bells I hear, the people all exulting,
While follow eyes the steady keel, the vessel grim and daring;
But O heart! heart! heart!
O the bleeding drops of red,
Where on the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.

O Captain! my Captain! rise up and hear the bells;
Rise up--for you the flag is flung for you the bugle trills,
For you bouquets and ribboned wreaths for you the shores a-crowding,
For you they call, the swaying mass, their eager faces turning;
Here Captain! dear father!
This arm beneath your head!
It is some dream that on the deck,
You've fallen cold and dead.

My Captain does not answer, his lips are pale and still;
My father does not feel my arm, he has no pulse nor will;
The ship is anchored safe and sound, its voyage closed and done;
From fearful trip the victor ship comes in with object won;
Exult O shores, and ring O bells!
But I, with mournful tread,
Walk the deck my Captain lies,
Fallen cold and dead.

-----
drop notes:
- poetry by: [Walt Whitman"]
- Dead Poet's society [info]

Illo Friday: Emergency

2007-08-15T23:19:00.000+09:00

The Interview
Swish! Zoomed the elevator. Ting! As the two mirrored doors parted ways right in front of me, I saw an empty room with plain white walls. A lone portrait of a woman hangs by the right and on my left, a glass wall with the encryption “Je Maintiendrai” served as a divider for the corridor and a smaller room.

Name please? A startling voice greeted me, without noticing that I have moved from the elevator unto the 26th floor lobby. As I gave out my name, a small piece of glossy paper was handed to me. V005, it read.

It looked bigger than what is seen outside. This smaller room served as a waiting room for the people who will be interviewed. A big sign that says no mobile phones allowed welcomed everyone that comes through the door. I sat by a wooden chair at the farthest corner so I could see everything at front. Either that or I would like to avoid people staring at my back.

A glace at my watch indicated that there was nothing else left to do. The windows will open after an hour, said the gateman. And by then we should be ready with our papers. I surveyed the room and it was only me and seven other fellas sitting. No word was uttered amongst each other and the distance of each chair didn’t help at all.

But the view... yes, the astonishing view made me gasp for a big gulp of air. On my right, the only thing that divided me and the whole city was a clear glass. How I hoped it was a very, very thick glass! I was afraid to put down a finger on it. My paranoia screamed in my mind that the glass will fall off and the air will suck me right out of the building! I moved a couple of inches further away from the glass but the city didn’t felt smaller and the streets down below didn’t disappear. Yes, I am afraid of heights…but nothing scared me the most than being the next one to be interviewed.

So for emergency cases as this, I took out my pen and ripped a piece of paper from my duplicates file folder. It was a photocopy of my bank statement. I folded it and then with the faint silence and an occasional clearing of throat from the person in front of me, my hand drew what my eyes saw. A quick three minutes is all that it takes to calm me down. And I stared outside unto the world. Waiting… for my turn.

"there but not here"
4" x 5" (orig.)
sketch on recycled paper

Illo Friday: Missing

2007-08-07T05:26:00.001+09:00

"missing the moon"
500 x 670
MS Paint

-----
note: the title came from one of my fave songs of the field mice. lyrics cant be found anywhere in the net so maybe i post it in a while. pls support them by buying the original. tc!

Moody Monday: Lonely

2007-08-01T15:37:00.000+09:00

feels so damn lonely without you..

*.*

Illo Friday: Moon

2007-07-29T06:44:00.000+09:00

i started blogging back in november of 2004 as a way of therapy. and looking back.. woah! it has been almost 3 years indeed and so much have changed in me! for my old readers.. you have seen me in my worst and best. thanks for sticking by through it all..

i know this is an old illo and i posted this before back when illustration friday was just a page where posts per week hardly reached a hundred, and i havent even heard of flickr yet. but soon as i saw this week's topic i felt the urge to go back and in going back and seeing, reading, my old posts.. it's like flying to the moon and back indeed..

this is for you old and new IF artists.. it was fun and will always be fun learning with you all..

520 x 740
MS Paint

-----
note: pass by my old post for IF topic: small, december 1, 2005.

Photo Friday: Vacation

2007-07-24T21:25:00.000+09:00

"dive into the deep"

the background
saturates with the dark
as the only light shimmer
by the distance
we stare
the calm breeze
embraces us with maybes
slowly fading with the night
and melts the past behind
as we wait
for the million kisses to light
the blue ashed sky
and the sad sea awaits with us
waiting for us..
to take a leap
and dive in deep
into its vast depths
without seeing whats beneath
but remain knowing
that as we dive
there is no turning back
and all that was left
all that was gone
was all worth it.

-----
note: this is a tribute to the anniversary of my vacation to Palawan with Ambres. photo taken exactly last year at Puerto Princesa, just behind the hotel where we stayed.

illo friday: poem

2007-07-21T09:23:00.000+09:00

I had a dream
we were walking by a river
stiffened by the snow
I stopped and leaned over to look at the reflection
the unbreakable ice shimmered clear
You bent down too
and
the smile on your face glowed with the faint sun
then I wondered
as I felt the warmth of your hand
glide to mine –

the corners of my mouth
inched and fluttered into a near smile
hearing the hiss and whisper
of collapsing leaves disturbed by the breeze
and your breath,
calmly panting beside my ear
echoes the desire triggering a distinct warmth inside

through the reflection
we saw each other’s soul
and all around us
like an immense and endless ocean
was a great soundless void that swallowed
our voice,
our vocabulary,
our thoughts…

in that surreal moment
in a silence that spoke a thousand words
I knew this was the place where I want to be
with this gentle mutely lit surroundings
holding the fire that does not die down
despite the distance, despite time.

And so I wondered,
yes, in my dream I wondered -
that I would either
weep or succumb to the dark depths
or both!
if I would ever wake up
and find You
not there.

-----
note: entry for
(orig. 985 x 465, green 0.5 ball point pen on white recycled paper)
please click the image for a better view.

.seven.. seven.. seven..

2007-07-07T08:25:00.000+09:00

seven thousand kisses, then another seven hundred,
then yet another thousand, then a second hundred..
we will mix them all up so that we don't know,
and so that no one can be jealous of us when he finds out
how many kisses we have shared...(7)

illof friday: twist

2007-07-02T06:53:00.000+09:00

this is how twisted and strange i organize my chaotic life.
don't ask me why...

"twisted"
MS Paint
(orig. 800 x 600)

Illo Friday: Rejection

2007-06-18T04:19:00.000+09:00

The tragedie of working too hard,
is to have your ideas
either rejected or stolen.

"we are our own blackhole"
MS Paint + Picassa
(orig. 590 x 720)

Have you ever had that idea that creeps thru your head and makes you proud to think nobody ever thought of it before you? like a painting you've been wanting to do, or an invention you've been wanting to create... and you never told anyone because you haven't done it yet.

what if, suddenly one unexpected day.. you glance upon a store in a mall.. and wala! your idea or concept have materialized right before your very eyes!

tragic, isn't it?

Tribute for My Grandma

2007-06-14T12:42:00.000+09:00

Last Monday, my Grandma passed away. She was my mother's aunt. She was 93 and she had a prosperous life. My Grandma and Grandpa never had kids of thier own. But living together for all those years, we have seen how they fell inlove and loved all over again each time they encounter trials.

Today is her burrial. And eventhough my Grandpa is left alone, I know that the memories of their centennial love will remain in him.

I found this vid on youtube and evenif I usually post things that I found and liked over the net on another blog, I consider this day as one of those dark days where I realize how precious life really is, that we shouldn't waste any minute of it. And that the decisions we choose today will make us who we will be and be with in the future.

For both my Grandparents, I know you have found peace..
and separation will really never keep you apart.

-----
vid note: Explosions in the Sky - "Your Hand In Mine"

Illo Friday: Cars

2007-05-28T15:20:00.000+09:00

for illustration friday topic cars, and how you ride your life

sometimes, i feel guilty to myself.
will i ever make a living out of the things i love to do? or just as always, learn to love the things that i do that earns a living?

sometimes i envy the painters, poets and writers, who just sit back and do these things that they most enjoy and still make it from day to day.

sometimes society forces us not to be ourselves just so we can survive. despite being adaptable, flexible and easily taught, we camouflage ourselves just to blend in.

sometimes i lack the time for myself to ever pick up the pen and write down my thoughts. and oh, how i would love to paint again! but it's the daily errands and my job that's keeping me from myself.

sometimes i say to myself, it's all a matter of managing time. but time cannot be bought and time cannot be brought back.

sometimes, the day pass by in a robotesque way that time easily slip without knowing how it breezed out so fast.

sometimes, yes, sometimes, time is a vehicle that pushes us to travel in a direction we control but cannot choose otherwise. it drives in a straight line or destined path that we tend to hold to the steering wheel and concentrate on looking ahead. and by not looking at your sides, you miss all the breathtaking and wonderful sights... that when you finally stop and look around, you realize that you just missed something beautiful that could have been significant and might have changed your life.

Moody Monday: Light

2007-05-01T00:25:00.000+09:00

This is how i play with light..

-----
note: here's another stars are insane - camera painting for ya'll.. also my entry for this week's Moody Monday

illo friday: polar

2007-04-25T07:08:00.000+09:00

“I will love the light for it shows me the way,
yet I will endure the darkness because it shows me
the stars.” - Og Mandino

"the stars are insane"
a camera painting

by using the light from a mobile phone, a mirror, a dark room and a digital cam as a paintbrush tossed around the air thru an invisible canvass, i paint using light in extreme and indefensible polar positions, pleasuring the eyes with opposite extremes.. what the stars cannot shed light on, the heart can feel.

Photo Friday: The Blues

2007-04-18T11:58:00.000+09:00

touched by the tragedie..

let us pause, and give a moment of silence
for all the souls who departed this material world,
to those who may have gone to a better place,
that they may find peace.
peace,
that will never be of this world
nor of this time..

-----
note: my contribution to Photo Friday and Moody Monday: Disorganized, for only in unity will we prevent such occurrences in the future... as I send my condolences to the friends and relatives of the victims of the VA Tech Tragedie

Illo Friday: Fortune

2007-04-14T13:24:00.000+09:00

sometimes in life,
the fates would lead you
to your unplanned destination,
it's not luck,
it's not coincidence,
it's simply inevitable.
and it's just a matter
of seeing,
feeling
and accepting
what comes...

"did she cast such a shadow?"
MS Paint
(orig. 840 x 650)

-----
note: to be honest, this is what my previous entry "when kaleidoscopes color the night" looked like before transforming it into patterns.

Moody Monday: Masculine

2007-04-12T18:11:00.000+09:00

"At least you must know that whoever frees me from life will deliver me from the greatest suffering. What I may afterwards incur in uncertain, but from what I shall be set free is not in question. Every unhappy life is happy in its ending, and those who feel true sympathy and pain for the anxieties of others want to see this ended, even to their own loss, if they really love those they see suffer and think more of their friends' advantage than of their own."

-----
note: my first entry for Moody Monday

text taken from Letter 5: Abelard to Heloise (To the Bride of Christ, from His servant)

Illo Friday: Green

2007-04-10T20:07:00.000+09:00

The Stars turn around the pole, and the moon colours the night,
But that star is fading that should be my guide.
Now, if through the repeating shadows, my own star should appear,
No longer will my mind know the darkness of grief.
You to me are Lucifer, who must banish the night.
Without you day is night to me, with you night is splendid day.

"when kaleidoscopes color the night"
MS Paint
(orig. 970 x 590)

-----
note: text above is an excerpt from the "Lost Love Letters" of Heloise and Abelard. Through their impassioned writings unfolds the story of romance, adoration, devotion and grief, from its reckless, ecstatic beginnings through a public scandal, an enforced marriage and its devastating consequences.

Somehow, their tragedie inspired this illo which I did just now.

illo friday: snap

2007-04-05T07:30:00.000+09:00

twice drowned, now this cat
nine lives cut
de ja vu, i snap!

"my mix and match memory snaps"
MS Paint
(orig. 750 x 560)

Photo Friday: Growth

2007-04-03T23:18:00.000+09:00

it is unusual for me to post flowers.. but this kindles to my fancy. for this peculiar flower is akin to a woman so familiar to me, an exotic species growing amongst congested air and with little or no sunshine, but still endures these harsh factors and manages to stand out and be beautiful, bold and admired. *.*

-----
update: also my entry for LensDay: Spring

Lens Day: Architecture

2007-03-30T05:20:00.000+09:00

A pedestal is as much a prison
as any small, confined space. - Gloria Steinem

Just a thought: Funny how the majority tend to secretly condemn those on a pedestal and commend them right in front. They just do not know how hard it is to stay there. Especially for someone who can't reach down as much as he wished he could.

-----
note: my entry for this week's LensDay

Photo Friday: Sentimental

2007-03-23T09:07:00.000+09:00

Lost by the wind's invisibility

consumed by sorrow
in a different plane
to places unknown
constantly in a monotone
yearning for heights again
in the brink of fright
and invulnerability

up in a muzzle
clinched, tied, twisted,
shivering as flown
ablaze by the fume
of the fraudulent illusion
of holding back that thought
while in deep motion

thus losing myself
in the deception of truth
mocking the steadfast redemption;
will I be ruined
as I devotiously cascade
the horizon’s silvertone
or would I just melt away?

stretching frail reason
delusive and vague
as the wind deliberately sweep me
into its absorbing compassion
increasing and increasing
and in abrupt pause I ignite
in the presence of nothing…

-----
note: updated the perfect image for this entry.. [best viewed large]

i posted this poem last friday and as i was traveling yesterday, i chanced upon this melancholic scenery. so i took my digicam and made the scene permanently available.

it's just so rare to see such beautiful cloud formations, add the leafless tree which resembles how i currently feel..

Photo Friday: Addiction

2007-03-16T08:23:00.000+09:00

yes, this is my addiction. randomly moving my camera in slow shutter to create trail lines from scarcely available light. Sometimes I use artificial light, like LEDs and my mobile phone, sometimes thru the limited sunlight beaming through my reddish curtains. and sometimes making use of a mirror for that too.

and now my addiction moved one step further, as i use my ever-reliable MS paint. for those who have seen my previous entries for illustration friday, 85-90% of the time, i use MS paint. it was only in my recent entries that I posted my light paintings.

i know this is photo Friday indeed. but here, i took a photo of my PC’s monitor after painting some lines on MS paint. and all lights off.

Illo Friday: Wired

2007-03-11T23:33:00.000+09:00

The Fall

i took no chances but held my ground
trying to reach up i fall about
there's two sections in an inter-cross state
one was to get you high one was to shake
a thousandth time i gave my page
the higher you rise the deeper you crash
so go on straight or up a little
but remember to not let go
from the fine line of your title.

-----
note: entry for | a [light painting]

Tomorrow Is Already Here

2007-03-07T02:39:00.000+09:00

M O O G I E

Illo Friday: Communicate

2007-02-28T05:56:00.000+09:00

"A woman can say more in a sigh
than a man can say in a sermon"
- Arnold Haultain

"The Wrrrath of HellcatAtomicVelvetSigh"
MS Paint
(orig. 650 x 770)

this 15-minute collage is a result of a mixture of insomnia, skipping lunch and dinner, listening to Ride's songs "Dreams Burn Down", "Decay" and "Paralysed" within the dark confines of a room with no internet connection and uncharged mobile phone at the dead time of unwaking in surreal dreams..

and they said im a strange guerrrrrl.. hey now, am i?

-----
note: loom over the domain of hellcats to unearth the poetry within the image

Lens Day challenge: Triptych

2007-02-27T07:23:00.000+09:00

"the morality of art consists in the perfect use
of an imperfect medium." - Oscar Wilde

left hand | hold my hand, i shall follow | right hand

A triptych is a work of art which is divided into three sections which are collected together. The central panel is the most important one, and this is flanked on either side by two lesser but related images. The whole is intended to be greater than the sum of the parts.

This is my entry for this week's Lens Day Challenge.

Just to share, i took these shots using the only available light in my room, one mid-afternoon.. the sunlight reflected by a mirror and my mobile phone. and with the help of my red curtains, navy blue ceiling and walls, these features seemed to unintentionally add to the effect.

-----
note: click the links below each image to see the original size.

Illo Friday: Gravity

2007-02-19T23:28:00.000+09:00

what does one need to shoot a perfect picture? the proper balance of gravity, stillness and light.

so, what is the result of improper balance of gravity, stillness and light? a classic example of camera painting..

And what does one need to not be kicked-out of the (seven) circles of Hellcat? The improper balance of rationality, creativity, TIME and the right sharpness of one's fangs!

bwahaha..

bite me };-}

Lens Day Challenge: Green

2007-02-14T23:50:00.000+09:00

Life is the flower for which love is the honey.
- Victor Hugo

This is to pay tribute to this day of the badly heart broken, dreamers and lovers alike..

-----
note: photo taken behind a green window.. which produced this effect.

Lens Day: Light

2007-02-13T03:25:00.000+09:00

Love of mine some day you will die
But I'll be close behind
I'll follow you into the dark

No blinding light or tunnels to gates of white
Just our hands clasped so tight
Waiting for the hint of a spark
If heaven and hell decide
That they both are satisfied
Illuminate the no's on their vacancy signs

If there's no one beside you
When your soul embarks
Then I'll follow you into the dark...

-----
note: text above is an excerpt from I'll Follow You into the Dark by Death Cab For Cutie. To listen to the song, click the upper left icon on their site.

been listening to this on repeat mode.. sorry, i just feel mushy today..
bite me, if you dare };-}

Illo Friday: Sprout

2007-02-08T08:56:00.000+09:00

She shot him down

she wakes up with the sun beaming to her eye
a heat cluttered stuck to her brain
spinning her head to unmemory
brink of blindness unsustained

digging back from her yesterday
forcing to remember what words were said
still nothing - as far as she can see
from the ten thousand scenes that twisted

a sudden spring of image clicked to her
from going back and forth and rewind
a shadow that made her laugh but not smile
is this the one?

she didn’t care where he’s been
and don’t care what he plans to do
a fool’s numbness sprouted and lingered
as they both let the day pass too

she waited for that moment that never came
and all her patience came burning
so time has sent the signal to halt
and she knows he always had it coming..

---—–
note: Oh, was i listening too much to Stone Roses or not? lol..
a poem to pay tribute to Feb 2nd.. and the camera painting entry for illo friday..

Illo Friday: Red

2007-01-29T07:40:00.000+09:00

The wind was blowing where were we?

MS Paint
(orig. 840 x 650)

-----
note: my mind goes blank with the mere sight of this.. *sigh*

Lens Day Challenge: Peaceful

2007-01-25T17:28:00.000+09:00

waiting for the sun to set

in the stillness of the moment
his brightness radiate by the distance
one of those gleams of genial fire
that darted across all oceans

from a standpoint of her dillydally life
whom was once aquainted only
with the grey twilight
now saw that there is more truth
to admit than be inclined

so unlike the calm lake,
she danced and sparkled and prattled
in a no nonsense senibility
awaiting his fire to come closer-
gaining the shadow of his presence
in a forbidden proximity

and wraped in the blinding light they float
slowly burning the velvet horizon
with the scene of life
that passes before the eye

they create, destroy and restore
over and over and over
and as they let go of their last breath,
a final etch painted across the sky..

that their passion shall burn forever.

-----
note: this is a photo for those who miss Tagaytay.
although as for my poem, i think i need a more dramatic image..
bite me };-}